Going Deep

Hello! I hope everyone is having a great weekend. I am currently blogging outside by the fire, eating kebabs, from the st. lawrence market... on a really uncomfortable chair. You never really respect the little things until your doing something... small. Like... I don't know how to explain it. Have you ever just sat outside, in your backyard, or out in the goonies? You don't think, you just sit and use your senses, and when you experience that truley amazing thing, you have experienced "the little things". You must be wondering what that truly amazing thing is? Well, you have to experience it to know.
So, no I did not go to Wonderland today. Sucks. But, I did however have an awesome day at Woof Stock. LOL! The name is ridiculous I know! It was truley amazing. I have never seen so many dogs in my life! Big dogs too!!! Like... YOU COULD STRAP A SADDLE ON THEIR BACKS AND RIDE THEM THROUGH THE EXHIBITION!!! It was ridiculous! I had alot of fun. Lucy (my dog) had alot of fun. I'm at my dad's house this weekend. Everyother weekend I go to his house. I don't really need to explain to you the situation. It's interesting, becasue I have so many friends who's, parents are still together but, the problems they have... I just think you'd be better off divorced. I mean if your fighting that much, and your kids are that miserable, just leave each other. For god sakes just leave one another! I don't mean to be harsh about it but, that's the truth. Divorce sucks, there's nothing to it, it just sucks. So, why sweeten it. It gets better over time but, when it happens it sucks, period, point, blank.
I have a tendancy to side track if you haven't noticed. But, that's the way I am , so why hold back? Why is it that no one is willing to embrace their personalities? When I embrace it I get cut eye for no reason. Doesn't stop me though :p Everyone needs to go do this... go outside, right now, and at the top of your lungs scream I AM ME, SO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT! That's all anybody needs to say, and then you are ready to embrace you personality. Except you for you and not for what everyone else expects you to be.
I love techno. Like love it! I don't know why but, I guess it's because of the mesh of sounds that come together and make you want to bop you head to it. I love it!!!!!
I like to (DADDY) just sit sometimes and think. Sometimes I think too much so, it makes me feel terrible. Thinking just makes me dizzy... literally. I'll close my eyes to think, there are so much thought moving around I'll become dizzy. Ever since April it's gotten really bad. I've become dizzy at night. It scares me. I feel like I'm falling into a black pit. Then, when I open my eyes it's gone, that feeling is gone. But, mentally it still haunts me each time I feel a thought creep into my head, and I want to close my eyes. Shut them just for a second to fully understand that one thought but, another thought creeps in, and then another.... then, there it is, that pit, that swallows me whole, and consumes my thought and my happiness. The only thing it spits back up is fear, which I am forced to cary around like a tumour attached the back of my throat. It sits there swollen, a lump that hurts each time I swallow because I can feel that thought creeping into my head.
Originally Patience